So, I’m struggling tonight. Was having a really good day until after dinner. I started thinking about what I had just eaten, and then I was thinking about all the Ensure I have in my kitchen, and all I could think was dumping it down the drain. All I can think about is the calories. I’m glad we have a supportive therapist. I don’t want to seem to dependent on him though. The other thinng is I feel like crying, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I’m supposed to not show my emotions, or at least that’s the message I have always gotten. I just want to cry and scream and mourn the loss of my childhood. I know that will come with time. As my therapist says, I have to be ppatient.



  1. I’ve been lost in this trance of self hared all night, worse than usual. I hate feeling like this. I hate how my ED makes me feel, like a big fat failure. I just want you to know you’re not alone 3


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