how?

how do you eat when you don’t know how to nourish your body? how do you heal from something so profound that it changes your life? how!!! i wish someone would tell me how!!! I wish we could get help!!! we can’t do this alone!!!

Ray

Tired of getting my hopes up

Hi everyone,

So I’m tired of getting my hopes up only to have them – to again. I thought I was going to get to go to Renfrew in Chicago for eating disorder treatment. They recommended the residential program, so I assumed that they had that program at the Chicago location. I later looked at their website only to realize they did not have residential at that location. So even if they did do a single case agreement with my insurance, I would not be able to go as the residential location is in another state. I am done reaching out to people to ask for help only to be told that I can’t be helped or to be told by the insurance company that they’re not going to pay for something. I just wish something positive would happen! I don’t want to end up on the medical floor getting a feeding tube because insurance refuses to pay for the treatment that we need!

Ray

from emmie

it’s emmie. im not ok. im very very very sad. I don’t wanna eat. I hate food. ammica and tara and amythist aren’t ok. they’re struggling with flashbacks. just not ok today. just feeling blah.

emmie age 12

update

I’m just so discouraged. I just wish things could be normal for us. I just want a treatment team. Is that to much to ask for?

Ray

tags[alters, DID, treatment, eating disorder, mental health, mental illness, disability]

It whirlwind of craziness and frustration

Hi everyone,

So we don’t have a therapist or a primary care provider. Was supposed to see the psychiatrist on the 18th which was my birthday, but got there and found out he was out sick. They said they tried to call me but they had the wrong phone number. Getting a new primary care provider on 13 August. The electrophysiologist we had left the practice so know how to see someone else so cannot get medications raised until we see him. How do you go to the ER this past Sunday to get fluids because blood pressure was 78/35. Yesterday morning it was 72/27 but I can’t go to the ER every time it’s low. Just wish this craziness with Stup. So basically right now for support we just have our dietitian and another lady who is helping us through an organization called beauty after bruises. Every therapist I have tried to call has said that there are either too far away, can’t work with my insurance, or didn’t think they could work with my issues because they are so complex. Because I have postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome, the anorexia does not make that any better, but how am I supposed to get treatment when no one wants to work with my insurance and my insurance doesn’t want to pay for the programs that can help!

Ray

CANT do this!! just cant *tw*

so just found out that after all these years, insurance doesn’t even have all my diagnoses listed. They don’t even have PTSD. i basically have to be re-evaluated for everything!! just feel like ing crazy!!! i want out!!! i cant do this!!! this with the news that we got from our dietitian today, just to much!!!Ray

NOW WILL THEY LISTEN? *tw*

ITS ENIGMA. WE WERE TOLD TODAY THAT IF WE CONTINUED TO LOSE WEIGHT THAT OUR DIETITIAN WOULD HAVE TO SEND Us SOMEWHERE TO GET A TUBE!!!! OUR LABS ARE OFF AND OUR WEIGHT IS BECOMING CRITICAL. I mean SHE WANTS TO TUBE US, I MEAN I DONT THINK SHE WANTS TO, BUT SHE MIGHT HAVE TO. WHEN IS IT GOING To BE ENOUGH FOR THE INSURANCE COMPANY TO SEE THAT THEY NEED TO STEP UP and STOP BEING SO DAMN MONEY GREEDY!!!! WE CANT JUST DO THIS WITH OUR DIETITIAN. SHE SAID HERSELF That THERE WAS ONLY SO MUCH SHE COULD DO.

ENIGMA

PASSWORDED POST

Going to be passwording a post. please email me if you want the password.rayette.rucker23@gmail.comMarisa

Therapy in a little bit

Hi everyone, We have therapy in like half an hour. Enigma needs to talk to him today about her feeling suicidal. I hope we have a good session. Ray