to disappear TW ED mentioned

Trigger warning: anorexia and behaviors

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

t

Just want to disappear,

Grow smaller and smaller, not die, just be smaller.

i know losing weight will never make me happy, but the allure is so appealing.

want to get all the food out…

want to count and count. had to count calories when younger, part of MC programming.

not sure how to break the cycle.

will the trauma be to much?? want to stay looking like a little girl, maybe then i wouldn’t have been hurt?

want to lose and lose and lose.

don’t deserve food.

not worthy…

but somehow i want to recover.

want to be free from the MC programming.

Emmie 12

One Reply to “to disappear TW ED mentioned”

  1. Hi Emmie, thanks for sharing. I understand it must be so hard for you to consider being in an adult body. I hope your host can show you that she is safe now and there are healthy, empowering ways to reclaim your body. I know that it takes time too and I am sorry you are hurting and in pain. Leni.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s