another update

I failed miserably to eat any of my meals today. I just hate food. I fear food because I don’t want to gain weight. Food to me is fat… I just want to stop this cycle, but don’tknow how to get the control back. Food controls my life. I feel like if iI don’t eat, I have control, but really the food is controlling me…

trigger talk of eating disorders 

update trigger talk of eating disorders

so my therapist told me today that i meet all the signs of anorexia except being underweight. I had to promise my therapist I would eat an entire meal this week. I’m honestly not ready to give up my behavior, because it’s become like a friend to me. I restrict my food intake. I’m just looking for support. I know it’s not healthy, but I keep doing it. It’s like the food has the control. I feel as if I’ve lost control. Not sure how to get it back.