I’m just so angry all the time. Why mommy did you beat me and do the things you did? Why daddy did you do the things you did? I don’t understand why I had to go through. I’m just so angry and alone and frustrated. only sixteen, but I have a lot to be angry about. I just wish things had been different when I was younger. Amelia tags{lbindness, mental illness, Alters, dissociative identity disorder}


Hey, it’s Amelia, and I am feeling interesting. I am feeling aggravated and agitated. I am doing okay I guess. We’ll talk more about feeling post. I just need someone to vent to. I’m only sixteen, but I have a lot of responsibility to uphold the system. I just need a friend. I’m just hoping to be able to talk to people more I just really don’t know what to say. I’m feeling a lot of things, and some of them can’t be mentioned on this blog. I just wish everything would stop and go away. I hate my marriage then flashbacks. I just hate it. I just want some form of really and I don’t care how I get it. It needs to come, and it needs to come now. I need me!

therapy today

so, I have therapy today, and it was really good. We talked a lot about the Alters And what I could do to keep them all safe. We discussed a lot about Amelia and Amber and how we could work on teaching them better coping skills I also discussed process cooperation instead of integration with the Alters.


hey, it Lucy and me scared. We don’t want to remember the stuff that happened to us. Me only four, but me knows how to type. Me is using voice to text. Me no like big people. Me scared of big people.

update time

so, I had nightmares last night about being chased by a shark. Love like 2 hours today, and I still have nightmare. I slept like 2 hours today, and I still have nightmares. I have therapy tomorrow, and maybe some of my alters will come out to speak. I’m not sure though, so I will just keep I’m not sure though, so I will just keep trying anyway. I’m trying to make this blog post longer so I can get more followers and readers I’m trying to make this blog post longer so I can get more followers and readers. struggling with thoughts of anorexia today including restricting and over-exercising. My alters are going to make blog posts today introducing themselves and telling them a little Introducing themselves and telling them a little about themselves. thanks for reading, and everyone have a Thanks for reading, and everyone have a blessed day.

Hard night

so, I had a hard night last night. I had a dream that I was swimming and I was being chased by shark. It was very much. I also had dreams about my childhood and stuff that went on there. I just wish I could make everything stop and go away. I could go to the other facility and everything I hope everything went well. I hope everything went well today with the doctor being able to help me get into the other Priscilla. I really have to go to Michigan, and I think my life would be much better there. I have more opportunities there because they have a guide dog school, they also have group homes for people with mental illness.

Long but good day

I had a very long but good day. The day is not over yet, so there might be still more to come. Things to come. Network my counselor, and she told me that we have to talk to another person tomorrow to talk to the doctor about getting into this program. The Forest View Psychiatric Hospital trauma program is for people with trauma-based disorders including post-traumatic stress disorder, borderline personality disorder, and dissociative identity disorder. It is a branch of The Culinary Institute Colin Ross Institute. Alters are doing relatively well today. I just wish I could communicate with them better.

Update time

So, I am doing really well today. just spoke with Meridian Health Plan, and they told me that all I had to do was get a prior authorization from my doctor that said Why the facility I’m going to is better than the one I am in now. After doing this and it is approved, I have to apply for Medicaid in Michigan and then once that is approved, then I go to Michigan for treatment. I have therapy on Friday and I’m really excited for that. I’m meeting with my counselor here in like an hour. Things are looking up, and I can’t wait to join the Special Olympics swim team. I don’t know who will drive me to Michigan, but I hope it’s someone from here. I can’t really afford a train ticket or a plane ticket, so hopefully someone here can drive me there.

Want a job

so I’ve been living in this facility now for 10 months. I’m still depressed, because I don’t have a job. Living on $30 a month is very hard. I just want a job. That’s all I’m asking.

Hard night

So I had a hard night last night because of nightmares and flashbacks. Just wish I could make everything. Enjoying the Special Olympics swim team in February. I’m meeting with my counselor this morning to contact my insurance company about going to the Forest View Psychiatric Hospital program in Michigan. I will make a post about that later today. I’m also meeting with her for our Regular half hour session.