ramblings of Rayette

So, hi. I just moved to Peoria yesterday, and I love it!!! It’s so awesome!!!! I love the staff herre. My psychiatrist confirmed the diagnosis of DID today as well. He said it went along with borderline personality disorder. I just hope this place is all I think it is.

update for today

So struggling with flashbacks today. I know God is with me because I can feel his presence. I know He will never leave me. I know he is always with me. I know He loves me and only wants the best for me. I know He would only want good for me and not harm.

update for today

Trigger warning:

So, I really need to say this. I’m struggling with flashbacks like crazy… I haven’t dissociated today, but I’ve been having flashbacks of my abuse… I just want to be a thriver and not just a survivor…

update for today

Trigger warning:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, I’ve been having flashbacks lately about my abuse… My father started sexually abusing me when I was one. I had a foster family who were members of a cult. They would involve me in their various activities. I wish I didn’t have to keep remembering more and more of what happened to me… I want to be not just a survivor but a thriver as well.

update for today

So I move to Peoria next Wednesday. I’m getting excited for this move. Still struggling with flashbacks and dissociation although not as much. I have God to thank for that.

update for today

So today was pretty good. I haven’t dissociated today or switched personalities. I didn’t sleep last night because of nightmares… I wish the nightmares and flashbacks would go away…

update for today

I have forgiven all the people who abused me. I mean all of them. I have forgiven every last one of them. Also, I got filled with God’s Holy Spirit yesterday. I now walk in peace in God’s peace. It’s such a great feeling to know that God is watching over me. I’m just so excited to see what God will do in my life from now on. I’ve been struggling with dissociation a lot lately. I just wish I could control my other personalities…