NATIONAL SYSTEM PRIDE DAY!!!

So today is national system pride day. It was set up by the Entropy system on YouTube. You need to be proud of your system and for what they ‘be helped your survive. They all deserve to know that they are appreciated. Show them love and do something to make them feel appreciated. Play with your littles or write them notes if you don’t have good communication. And don’t forget to check out the Entropy system on YouTube!!

thoughts from Nikki

DO YOU SEE ME? DO YOU HEAR ME? I FEEL SO ALONE IN THIS world WHERE I HAVE TO SHARE A BODY WITH SO MANY OTHERS THAT NO ONE ON THE OUTSIDE SEES. I JUST WANT TO BE ME. I JUST WANNA BE SIXTEEN. IS THAT TO MUCH TO ASK? AM I ALLOWED TO BE THE TEENAGER I NEVER GOT TO BE?

NIKKI

despair

So just got a message from our PCP that River Oaks isn’t an option and that our only options were Passavant psych unit which won’t accept us, and to follow up with our psychiatrist for the other medical issues. We’ve basically been told that the one place in the country that can help us with all our issues isn’t an option because of insurance. don’t even know why I even try.

Ray

asking for help feels hopeless and fruitless…

asking for help doesn’t seem to produce any results. none of the three doctors who said they would make the referral have done it… dont even have the energy to use exclamation marks anymore… my dietitian referred me to the weight loss and wellness program which supposedly has an eating disorders team, but there are no medical doctops overseeing their ED patients. my team has basically given up on me except my therapist, but the insurance won’t accept a referral from my therapist, because it has to be a doctor who makes the referral. My PCP and psychiatrist both aren’t seeing us for 2 months. i dont know what to do or say…

Ray

CANT do this!! just cant *tw*

so just found out that after all these years, insurance doesn’t even have all my diagnoses listed. They don’t even have PTSD. i basically have to be re-evaluated for everything!! just feel like ing crazy!!! i want out!!! i cant do this!!! this with the news that we got from our dietitian today, just to much!!!Ray

Therapy in a little bit

Hi everyone, We have therapy in like half an hour. Enigma needs to talk to him today about her feeling suicidal. I hope we have a good session. Ray

OUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL PLEASE SUBSCRIBE

So we just wanted to share our YouTube channel here. We talk about life with DID, eating disorders, depression, PTSD, BPD, and other stuff. So, come on over and SUBSCRIBE and SHARE!!!

My Multiple Life

Just type it into the searchfield.

Ray

Will things ever get better?

Hi everyone,

I don’t even know where to start. This whole trying to get help in reaching out is beyond frustrated because everyone is saying there’s nothing they can do. Insurance is saying I don’t meet criteria, yet I continue to lose weight. The crisis center and other hospitals aren’t excepting us because of the complex medical issues the trauma and the visual impairment. I feel like I am complaining and then I shouldn’t do that. I was told by a very trusted friend that he didn’t believe in SR a. He said it was my reality but that he didn’t believe in it. I don’t even know where I can go for support anymore. The one hospital that will except us we cannot get to because no one is willing to drive us. We are such a burden that no one is willing to drive us 45 minutes to get the help we need actually maybe it is an hour and a half, but still! We just want help, is that too much to ask?

Ray

Good morning

So, how is everyone doing today? We’re doing ok today. Still feeling suicidal though, but we’ll have to make the best of it. Have to fake it till we make it. All I know is that I can’t keep going like this. We’re continuing to lose weight. Not sure how much longer I can keep doing this. I just feel so alone. I could really use a friend. Just feeling really defeated. I want to cut. I’ve never done that before. T’i always been Amilia. Not sure why I want to do it. Does this mean I’m a failure? I hate myself. I don’t want to live. My mood is all over the place. I hate this. I hope this insurance says yes. I really really hope they do.

Ray