Productive electrophysiologist appointment yay!

so today we saw the electrophysiologist. It was a very productive appointment. He’s starting me on Floren f. It’s a medication to help retain salt and water to help with the blood pressure. He also wants me to see an Ehlers Danlos syndrome specialist. He’s taking labs in like 3 weeks to check my electrolyte levels. i have to try the dose I’m starting on for a month, and if that doesn’t work, then we will raise the dose. Then we give that another month to see if it works. If it doesn’t, then we either try a med called Midadrine or do a tilt table test. I’m going back to see him in three months. He said the ED played a part in this. He said I most likely had POTS. He doesn’t know why I’m going to a neurologist. I now have to find an EDS specialist who takes Medicaid. Let the hunt begin!!! oh boy. Ray

FAKE SMILE

im tired of pretending everything’s ok. my meds aren’t working. my ED is out of control. my whole system is in chaos. i also found out today that residentil ED treatment isn’t an option. i tried applying to a free Christian residentil program for women called Mercy Multiplied, and they said that because of having DID, it makes me unsta and it’s more than they are equipped to treat. They say they treat trauma, but they don’t handle the most complex form of it. Guess I was have to accept that there is no help.

Ray

need a friend…

Hi, it’s Ray, and I just cant keep doing this. I need something for this depression. There are insiders who are stockpiling our sleep meds and anxiety meds. Although, you cant overdose on buspar. We cant go to our local ER because people don’t understand… Our caseworker told us that the ER didn’t want us there anymore and to not go there again for psych. To go to the next city would cost us $40 which we don’t have. Just could really use a friend.

Ray

psychiatrist appointment

So, we had our psychiatrist appointment yesterday, and the doctor put me on Ambian for sleep and Buspar for anxiety. He said he couldn’t put us on anything else because of the possibility of us overdosing….. I can understand that, but I need something for this fucking depression and these mood shifts. I told him about our panic attacks that would get so bad that I would end up dissociating because I would get so overwhelmed that another part would take over and end up doing harm to the body. He’s starting me off on ten MG of Buspar three times a day and five MG of ambian at bedtime. The manager of the clinic is working on getting me into an inpatient program for trauma disorders. I hate it when people tell me that Jesus can heal a chemical imbalance. I hate stupid religion. I don’t like it when people throw Scripture at me like it’s the answer to everything. If things would be solved just by praying about it, then we wouldn’t need meds or therapists, and the psychiatrists and therapists would be without a job. Don’t know how much more of this depression I can take.

Rayette